Shepherding When Sin Strikes
Every church leader, and every member, has witnessed it: one of the members of their church community gets caught it sin. Pornography, theft, adultery, drunkenness … and on and on. They may have come to you seeking help, or they were caught in their sin and are desperately seeking your advice and counsel. So what do you say to the member in trouble?
I have found using 2 Sam 12:7-14 to be very helpful. It is what the prophet Nathan shared with David after David and Bathsheba’s sin. Using material from Scripture gives people something to refer to again and again. Developing talking points from Scripture helps prevent the discussion from seeming as if you are attacking them personally. You are sharing ideas that come straight from the text. So here are the things you can address from that passage:
God has been good to them. He loves them, has saved them through Jesus, and has blessed them. Repentance is about a return to living the Jesus life again. They have to realize this is about their relationship with God above everything else.
They sinned. It is important for them to express what they did. This is to help them “come clean” in terms of what you have done. It is not a time for generic confession. It is a time to face plainly what has been done. Help them confront their sin.
Assume your sin will not stay secret. It is a natural defense mechanism to cover things up. They may have done this in the past. This is a time to work through who needs to know, or who already knows. This passage also reminds them that there will be embarrassment, humiliation, and shame. They have to prepare for this.
There are consequences to sin. Damaged relationships, job issues, legal implications, and more. Consequences can be addressed and dealt with.
Confession. Sinners have to know they did wrong, it is their fault, and they need to admit it. This is heart check time.
Forgiveness. Always we call them to the realization that God forgives. Always.
You may address these issues in differing order, and I find it sometimes takes multiple meetings. But this passage has often enabled me to help one of my people deal with sin.
Confession, repentance, forgiveness, and consequences.
One of your people will find themselves ensnared in sin and they will need help.
Perhaps this will help you minister to them.
