From “Who Am I?” to “Here am I!”

“Who Am I?” 

Often in Scripture, we find those we believe to be “pillars of faith” asking God, “Who am I?” This is not a bad question. In fact, it may be a very appropriate question if it indicates humility before God. However, we can ask the question in a way that excuses us from following God’s call. Consider Moses for a moment.

In Exodus 3, God confronts Moses in the burning bush. Out of the burning bush, God calls Moses, and Moses responds with “Here am I” or “Here I am.” God tells Moses that He has heard His people’s cries and is going to send Moses to bring them out of Egypt.

Moses hears God’s call and says, “Here am I,” but then hears what God’s call entails and comes back with a question: “Who am I?” Moses questions “his ability” to bring God’s people out of Egypt. But God promises Moses, “I will be with you” (Exodus 3:12). God tells Moses exactly how to share the news with the Israelites to convince them to follow Moses. However, Moses is not convinced himself. So, he asks God a couple more questions: 1) What if they ask me Your name? (Exodus 3:13) and 2) What if they don’t believe or listen to me? (Exodus 4:1) God has an answer for each question of reluctance. The overarching answer is I am with you and will make this happen. 

This brings us to Moses’ fourth expression of reluctance. Hear what he says to God: “Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue” (Exodus 4:10). Again, God responds to Moses’ reluctance by telling him that He, who created the mouth to speak, will speak through Moses. But Moses is not done yet.

Moses makes one final expression of reluctance to God’s call: “Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else” (Exodus 4:13). At this, God becomes angry with Moses’ reluctance. The same “servant” (as Moses called himself) who said, “Here am I” is now saying, “Who am I? Send someone else!” God is patient with us but will not allow us to manipulate Him. God tells Moses that He will send Aaron with him to speak. God will speak through Moses, who will then talk through Aaron. But the point is: Moses, you are going! 

But Moses is not the only “pillar of faith” that asks God, “Who am I?” There’s also David. When God tells David that he will become king and that, from his line, God will establish his throne forever (a foretelling of Jesus), David prays. In his prayer, David asks God, “Who am I, Sovereign Lord, and what is my family, that you have brought me this far?” (2 Samuel 7:18-29 and 1 Chronicles 17:16-27). He goes on in his prayer to thank God and asks for God’s continued blessing to carry out the role He has given him.

We see from these two approaches to God that there are two ways to ask the “Who am I?” question. First, there is the example of Moses, who is reluctant to answer God’s call because of his fear. Second, we have David, who asks the same question. But his asking isn’t based on fear but rather humility in answering the call. There is the “Who am I? Send someone else!” approach and the “Who am I to deserve this calling?” approach. One is of fear and reluctance, and the other is of humility. One is self-focus (how will this affect me?), the other is God-focused (why would God choose me?). 

The truth is, we all may start our approach to God with a more self-focused approach. We ask God, “Who am I?” because we either don’t want to do it or don’t think we can. This fear and reluctance are where we may start in our faith, but it doesn’t (and shouldn’t) end there. As we grow and become more confident in “who we are,” we approach God with greater humility and a God-focused approach based more on gratitude that the God of all creation would choose us. 

“Who am I?” I am God’s! Because I am God’s, I have nothing to fear. So, when He calls, and He will call, we can approach Him in humility and gratitude and say, “Here am I, send me! Do with me what you will.”

“Here Am I”

And so, we move from “Who am I?” to “Here am I!” Notice that as we make this movement in our spiritual journey, it moves from a question to a statement. We no longer question who we are because we are assured of our place and presence with the Father. Our identity is firmly placed in God, and we are willing and ready to be sent by Him. If you remember, Moses went from “Here am I” to “Who am I?” He started as a “willing servant” but soon moved to a reluctant and fearful approach to God as he learned what the calling would entail.

Yet, as we grow in Christlikeness, we reverse that Moses order and move from “Who am I?” to “Here am I!” We see this sort of movement with Isaiah. In Isaiah 6, the prophet shares a vision of heaven where he witnesses the angels praising God. Isaiah is humbled and stands before God with a “Who am I?” approach. Isaiah responds to the situation by saying, “Woe is me! For I am lost; for I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; for my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts!” (Isaiah 6:5). One of the angels then touches his unclean lips and cleanses his sin. It is then that hears God say, “Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?” To which Isaiah responds, “Here am I! Send me” (Isaiah 6:8).

Little did Isaiah know that God would send him to people who did not want to hear God's message. Yet, Isaiah was faithful to the call and went as he was sent. God is calling each of us as well. He is still looking for those who are willing to go for Him. The question is not if God is sending us but if we are willing to go. How are you responding to God’s call?