Developing Resilience

Of all the challenges and crises that exist in congregations today, the one that I want to name here resides with leaders themselves. Ministers and church leaders are truly struggling with their work, their roles, and their sanity. Hardly a day goes by for me without at least one conversation or email exchange with a minister in a spiritual or vocational crisis, or an elder ready to walk away from leadership and pastoral work.

In some ways this condition is not new. Researchers have long noted that ministers are in deep danger of burnout. A quick look at the literature shows that since the 1980s, ministers have been particularly vulnerable to stress, isolation, and pressures that foster depression and addictive behavior, and that often lead them to walk away from their calling. And, as a person who is in conversation with literally dozens of churches looking for ministers, I can testify that there are fewer and fewer ministers available to fill ministry roles.

This condition is now accelerating. Since the spring of 2020, with the sweeping challenges of the pandemic and an increasing conflation of politics with the Christian faith, church leaders are now faced with increased scrutiny, suspicion, and pressure. Ministers are weary, disappointed, and frustrated. Sadly, some ministers act out inappropriately, which only adds fuel to the destructive fires. And just as sadly, some ministers are simply walking away.

So what are we to do? Since I am writing a relatively short essay and not a book, I have a rather modest, yet significant, theme to offer. Today, with the many ministers, elders, committee chairs, and ministry leaders whom I know around the world, I want to offer a pastoral theme. I want to talk about resilience.

Resilience is the capacity to overcome difficult and overwhelming circumstances and continue to pursue one’s calling while remaining centered, balanced, and whole. In some ways, this definition of resilience sounds like perseverance. Being able to endure hardship and continue to press forward is certainly a necessary part of resilience. Yet limiting resilience to perseverance is not all that helpful or useful. For me to say, “Just hang in there!” does not really help. And besides, if resilience is only about endurance, then you will not know if you have resilience until you are tested.

Rather, I want to ask about the word capacity in the definition above. How does a person develop the capacity to overcome? This is where things get interesting – and hopefully useful. Rather than thinking about how one endures, I propose that we engage in practices that develop capacity. Bob Burns and his colleagues have noted in their research that there are five areas of life that need particular attention in order to develop resilience: spiritual formation, self-care, emotional and cultural intelligence, marriage and family life, and leadership. [1]

What strikes me about these categories is how much agency a leader possesses to actually attend to the factors that impact capacity. Questions quickly flood my thinking here:

• Am I practicing daily times of being present and attentive to God through prayer, Scripture reading, and quiet?

• Am I exercising or pursuing some hobby that engages my body and mind in something other than my ministry life?

• Do I take time to engage with friends, colleagues, or others to explore the challenges I am facing?

• Am I fully present in my family relationships?

The answers to such questions may give a clue to our capacity to be resilient!

One final note: relationships matter. If I were to put my finger on the one thing that hurts ministers the most, it’s the reality of isolation and loneliness. It is not hard to see how it happens. A minister, as minister, cannot fully share his burdens or heart with anyone within the congregation. And if a minister is not intentional about developing and nurturing friendships, mentors, and others, he can become quickly alone with his anxieties and fears. For a married minister, a good and vibrant relationship with one’s spouse is indispensable. However, no marriage should have to bear the full weight of a minister’s spiritual and emotional challenges.

So relationships matter. A recent Harvard Business Review essay makes this very clear. [2] Yet it is not merely about having a network of relationships; actually engaging in those relationships is what builds capacity. Our resilience grows when we talk with others, voice our fears, wrestle with possibilities, laugh at ourselves and our situations, reframe our dilemmas, and find ourselves. Of course, the HBR is addressing human relationships, and I believe it is true. The Apostle Paul spoke often of his coworkers who shared their lives and labor together. And in some real way, the active engagement in human relationships may also draw one to deepen our practices in relationship with God.

It is rough being a congregational leader today. It is rough being a disciple of Jesus. I see and feel this reality daily. So may I encourage the simple and vital work of developing the capacity for resilience, through active engagement of relationships in your life.

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[1] Bob Burns, Tasha Chapman, and Donald Guthrie, Resilient Ministry (IVP, 2013).

[2] Rob Cross, Karen Dillon, and Danna Greenberg, “The Secret to Building Resilience,” Harvard Business Review (January 29, 2021).