Turning Toward Resiliency
Flying these days is not much fun. You’re masked up for hours and airline companies are still running fewer (though fuller) flights. And there’s not even a free soda or pretzels!
Yet there I was, sitting on the aisle as the flight attendants were about to close the door. Suddenly a young woman rushed onto the plane, crying. Her quick appearance pulled me up from the book I was reading and our eyes met. She blurted from beneath a very damp mask, “I ran 10 gates! I thought I would miss the plane.” Such a disclosure, even to a stranger, demanded a response. “Well, you made it; all is well now!” I heard myself saying.
Sometimes perseverance is the victory. Sometimes being faithful is the order of the day.
And for those of us who practice leadership in congregations, we may need some different practices. Perseverance, or resilience, requires the recognition that I am not in control, and that I cannot fashion the future into my own image – which is a good thing! Let me name two practices that serve well the disposition of faithful, resilient leadership in these uncertain times.
Practice number one: let’s set aside what we know – or what we think we know. When persons come into the practice of leadership, the fear of failure is so extreme that they feel quickly and deeply the anxiety of “getting it right.” So with great effort, leaders apply what they know (which is a lot, by the way!) to the situation at hand. But such an approach misses some important realities. What leaders know is usually not about congregational mission and life. And let’s be real frank here: congregational mission is not like running a bank or a school. On top of that, congregational life and mission are too complex and too volatile (especially in this season) to simply rush in and start messing with things. For starters, God is at work (I am assuming that we believe this!), and that means we had better pay attention!
That means that resilient, faithful leaders practice suspending what they know. In other words, they practice patient, attentive listening to what is actually happening and looking for God’s fingerprints. The listening posture, the “unknowing” posture, feels weird and causes leaders to be “out of control.” But as a disciple of Jesus, I maintain that Christian leaders are really never “in control.” The church you serve isn’t yours anyway. It belongs to Jesus. And taking a posture of listening befits attentive disciples.
Practice number two: our listening stance, which acknowledges God’s ministry and leadership, then shifts our action. Rather than running to action, launching programs and plans of our own making, our listening moves to a posture of “holy disinterest” in terms of programs and plans. By using the term disinterest, I mean that the leader is less interested in specific program plans and action items and agendas for the program’s sake. Rather, the leader takes the posture of discerning what action or plan best serves God’s mission or reflects God’s deep desire for humankind. The focus of the leader’s attention is on God’s mission, God’s desire – not a particular program or agenda.
This disinterest doesn’t mean that the leader is unengaged or doesn’t care about outcomes, but that they work from a central conviction that God’s desire sets the tone for everything else. For instance, when a leader gets in her head that the church needs to add another service, sometimes that proposed service becomes the thing that dominates all other things. If she instead prayerfully considers God’s will or purpose, it is quite likely that any number of “programmatic” solutions might speak into God’s desire to see people find life in the name of Jesus.
If the leader is not prayerfully seeking God’s will, then who is? In congregational life, the answers will emerge when communities of leaders practice this disinterest – this prayer-filled commitment to God’s desire. Far too many leaders’ meetings focus on how to change a worship service, devoting far too little time to cultivating a posture of willingness to follow wherever we find God’s will prompting us.
All of us have had our moments like the young woman on the plane. Resiliency is direly needed. Faithfulness is critical. And practicing the dispositions of listening and disinterest are discipleship practices that remind us God is at work. And that reality – God’s action! – gives rise to hope.
