How To Do Intergenerational Ministry: Two Important Questions

An Unexpected Sunday Morning

Last fall, I spent a weekend with a church to consult about intergenerational ministry. I prepared slides, handouts, and a few discussion questions to help their leadership consider ways of being intergenerational. In other words, how can this community be more intentional about bringing together generations in mutual and meaningful ways? This question gets at the core understanding of what distinguishes intergenerational ministry from the more multi-generational approaches of being the church. 

The first operative word here—mutual—is about a true give-and-take happening between different age groups. Dialogue. Conversation. Real sharing of life between different groups. The second word—meaningful—is about creating experiences that bring deeper meaning to the lives of those sharing together. Both are essential aims if a community wants to become more intergenerational in nature. 

I arrived at the church on Saturday to explore the space for the next day. This church environment reflected that of many other churches. A renovated auditorium with pews curved inward to create a sense of community. A multi-purpose room with moveable chairs. Small classes where groups could gather during Bible class. We walked around the building, and I considered how we might use the space the next day. 

Then Sunday morning arrived. The minister informed me of some of the special activities they planned for this particular Sunday to go with our focus for the weekend. I gathered with the worship team in a circle of chairs to pray for the next hour. I grinned as I watched as the various leaders trickled into the room. An older individual with graying hair. The middle-aged parent with kids gripping tight to their legs. A young child entered with a small Bible in hand. I loved what I witnessed. The small gathering reflected that church community. All different ages, prayerfully ready to lead the upcoming service. 

That starting moment of the morning communicated something important about this church: they were already seeking ways to be intergenerational. They were already embodying the essence of this way of doing ministry. They intentionally elevated every age in that church to declare the work of God in their midst. I smiled through the service as I watched different ages and stages of life lead the community of faith.

I ended up changing my sermon at the last minute based on what I witnessed. Instead of calling them to become more intergenerational, I decided to affirm what was already happening in their midst. I named and affirmed the good generational work that was present and active in this small church. Yes, we still spent time in our Bible class discussing why intergenerational ministry matters. We spent time brainstorming things they could do to create more mutual and meaningful experiences between different ages. But I kept telling them what I saw: they were already living into this way of ministry!

The First Question

This experience is common when I work with churches. Most congregations are already creating worship services, small-group experiences, and service opportunities that embody intergenerational ministry. However, many church leaders do not give language to these dynamics. Therefore, I always remind leaders to begin using language that describes for their church where intergenerational moments are happening.  

Why? Because the language of a church creates the culture of that church. The words and phrases we use shape a community. Part of the church leader’s role is to shape the language of faith within the church. What we hold up, name, and bless are a key way to point a church toward a certain direction. One of the easiest ways to begin creating an intergenerational culture is to consider where it is already happening in your church. Then name it. Bless it. Hold it up as a way to embody what it means to be the people of God. 

This naming is a great first step because it creates a new kind of vision for the church. The congregation then begins to see themselves in new yet familiar ways. Simply saying “this is an intergenerational moment” gives a new perspective. Many churches do not need to start anything new. Instead, most church leaders simply need to start with that single question: Where is intergenerational ministry already happening in our midst? Once those current practices are identified, then a leader can hold those up as familiar examples but with fresh language. It is a key way to begin to shape the culture of a church.

The Second Question

Another exercise I conduct with church leaders is to first consider all of the different dimensions of the life of their church. I will take a dry-erase board and brainstorm with them the current arenas of their community of faith. Similar words are shared by different churches: Small groups. Worship. Service Projects. Bible Classes. Retreats. We end up filling the board with all kinds of activities and moments, whether common or unique to their church. 

Then I pose one question: How can we add one more generation to one of these arenas? Typically, there is a set way of doing each of these ministries or moments, with one or two generations already established as the target or sponsor of the thing in question. The generations of who does that thing is established within the community. Yet, there are always raised eyebrows and head nods when I ask this question. Many leaders have never considered simply adding one more age group to a given arena of their church. 

What would it look like to involve more young people in leading worship? What might it look like to launch a small group that was intentionally intergenerational? How would a Bible class be different (and better) if you spent a six-week series bringing together the Boomers into a class of teenagers for a special study? It is too much shock to the system of a church to try to change every arena of a church. You cannot help people get a vision for the possibilities of intergenerational ministry by trying to change everything at once. However, if you pick one thing, adding one age group to that ministry or moment, then people can better begin to see how this way of being the church might be better for everyone.

Better for Everyone

That final phrase is important to remember. Intergenerational ministry is a gift to everyone in the church. These mutual and meaningful moments are not about one generation giving to another, though that happens. Instead, they are about everyone giving and receiving the gifts of the community. Every age group is enriched and formed. 

If this vision of church is not yet named or happening, then these questions are a great place to start.